What do we ponder?

Running effortlessly towards pleasures that makes me feel better, I have understood the trap that I chose for myself. The happiness drowns my soul until I’m fully soaked. Maybe the sweet bliss is all that I want for my instant livin'. Like a little child, what would I not want? Bonding with everything as I go, running around in circles, feeding my brain different flavors of thoughts and sometimes laying devastated I have always wanted to see and seek a variety of things. I am just mere human being. Some pleasures gave intoxication, some thrashed me with different happiness. It was different. It was interesting.

But when slowly my innocence started to fade, the mind averted from the usual pleasure and tried to find different meanings. Time flew while experiencing different emotions on the go. Heavy emotions are gems laced with wisdom and I cannot deny this. The isolated voices of the deepest corners of head helped me knock my consciousness.

Refusal, silence, apathy, void, solitude helped me take different turns. These did not helped my find my lost happiness instead flourished the soul with satisfaction and hit me with some sense. No big sophisticated emotions these are. They are strong. They speak up for themselves. They bring chaos. They calm as well.

The idiosyncrasies of life has slapped us with different emotions and different answers in irrelevant situations. All that I took for is the time for myself to clear things at head.

One of the most averted topic, renunciation is not much talked about when pronounced about strong emotions. But the endless enduring public fascination with renunciation narratives have swept for a long time. Over a period of time, I feel like the renunciation, compelling and not so complicated as depicted. The nature of aesthetic it possesses, the relationship between intellectualism and intuition, and the grounds of our attachment to life itself is not odd but are something to give attention to. 

What does these actually help us achieve? So what is after happiness? Is that all? Is it really necessary to seek these things? What are we really focusing on? 

Ponder, my friends...